OH MY FUCKING GOD
"Asheville I love you, but you’re bringing me down.
Alas, my darling, it would seem that it was a bad idea to do my little penguin dance and choose a tourist town for my life mate. I thought you said it wasn’t all about money, but every time I tell you the one joke I know so well (Protip: the punchline is Bono) I notice your eyes glance at my credit report before you quietly refuse to trade goods or services for my super adorability. I sense the thrill is indeed gone, and/or that you’ve lost that loving feeling. On a side note, staring at me with those dead fish eyes when I kiss your lips does not do our relationship any favors. I don’t like sand. It’s coarse and it’s rough and irritating…and it gets everywhere…so I guess I’m saying AS CLEARLY AS POSSIBLE that maybe it’s not meant to be. Or maybe it’s only meant to be if I have rich parents. You mynx! Feel that slapass!"
asheville > personals > missed encounters (via xqizit)